Holiday-Huh!! May 30, 2007

Well we have returned from our ‘holiday’ away.

We spent five days down the island staying at the Adman’s Uncle’s house. It was meant to be an opportunity for us all to have a break away before I went back to work.  What it actually turned out to be ( for me) was a very stressful few days where I was having to look after a sick baby  who wasn’t coping with a change of routine and all the new noises around. 

 For the Adman it was a week of fun – he got to go duck shooting morning and night, stay up late drinking with his Uncle and catching up with lots of cousins.  He got the holiday he wanted at least!!.

 Actually I sound quite bitter but I’m not – really.  It was nice to have other people to talk to during the day and lots of people who wanted to hold and snuggle the Young Man.  But in reality I didn’t get the holiday that I was hoping for.  I still had to get up at 6.30 every morning, I still had to feed him three hourly ( thanks to his new dislike of the bottle) and try to get him to have naps during the day.  I still had to give him a bath every-night and get up to him when he woke.  I guess I was dreaming to think I would actually have a holiday where I would be able to relax - In reality I probably won’t have one of those – stay up late, sleep in, read lots of books and chill – holidays until the Young Man is about 12!

Recipe for Disaster May 26, 2007

Take one three month old baby

Add a seven hour car trip to a house which is far colder than they are used to

Mix in two noisy teenagers and a good pinch of loud music

Stir  in a large dose of congestion and a dash of  lack of sleep

Leave to simmer with a tired Mum and a Dad who is out hunting

Cover for four days and wait for the ‘fun’ to begin.

Boy oh boy am I looking forward to going home tomorrow 

Alarm Clocks May 18, 2007

I have just noticed that the last few posts have posting times that are usually very early in the morning – say 2am ish. Now as much as I would like to think that I would ( and could) post at that time of the day I am usually far more sensible and I am trying to sleep. It seems that for some reason the site hasn’t clicked onto the fact that I am posting from New Zealand – where at the moment it is 11am (I usually post around this time as its when the boy has his morning nap). I am so computer illiterate that I can’t figure out how to change it.

Anyway this got me thinking about time zones and how babies have their own time zones. I am very lucky in that my baby is happy to be on NZ time and he actually will go to bed when its night time here – unlike a friend’s 5month old who sleeps for 4-5 hours at a time during the day but will only sleep for 1 1/2 hours at a time during the night – I figure she must think she lives in California or something.

The Young Man has a very definite sleeping schedule – every night he goes to sleep at 7.45 and every morning he wakes at 6.30am. During the night he usually only wakes once and this will either be at 2.30 or 4.00am. In fact you can count on him so much that I will wake at 2.30 and if I don’t hear him stirring I go straight back to sleep only to be woken by him at 4am.

Since he was born my husband hasn’t had to set his alarm clock. He usually wakes at 6.30 to get up and go to work ( when he isn’t doing a night shift). There’s no need for the alarm clock now as the Young Man wakes up the house for us instead.

During the day he will usually have 2 morning naps and if I am lucky he will also have 2 afternoon naps – afternoon naps seem to be a bit of a hindrance to his social life. It doesn’t matter what time I finally get him to sleep – he will wake EXACTLY one hour later.  Just now I put his down at 10. 55 so I can be 99% sure that he will wake at 11.55.

It amazes me – here is a three month old baby who can do nothing for himself yet his body clock is so finely tuned he can sleep for such a precise amount of time.
The other thing that amazes me is how strong willed a three month old baby can be…. Since he was about a month old we have been giving him a bottle of expressed milk each day to get him used to having a bottle for when I go back to work.

Now that my start work date is only three weeks away he has decided that he doesn’t actually want to have a bottle. He much prefers the real thing thank you very much. We have tried everything – Adman feeding him while I am hiding in the bedroom, feeding him while standing, fresh breast milk, new teats with better flow, warm milk, cold milk but NOTHING works – he just spits it out and cries (which is something he hardly ever does so we know he means business when he does cry).  It has got so bad now that when he see the bottle coming towards him he will start to cry -talk about scarring him for life.

So we have decided that we will just leave it a week or so and try again. In the meantime I am just having to pump and dump to keep my supply high enough so that when ( I am trying to be positive here) he starts taking the bottle again I will have enough milk to do it.

I guess babies just choose what to focus on and for mine – its living by the clock and staying close to the boob.

Boots. May 15, 2007

Since I had the Young Man and I have been living in sweat pants and t-shirts.  I don’t usually venture out of the house for much more than a walk so this uniform has suited my needs. However now that my return to work date is rapidly approaching and I will have to wear real clothes I have been on the lookout for some new clothing. In New Zealand we are heading into winter and my current winter wardrobe is non existent (I was pregnant last winter so no clothes shopping occurred).

Usually I enjoy shopping… I peruse through the fashion mags and get an idea of what I like and then head out and cruise around the shops buying whatever takes my fancy. This time though I have a problem and I lovingly refer to the problem as “THE FLAB”. Yip I still have the horrible -you can grab it- flabby – post birth tummy. From what I have heard it takes eons to disappear and it never truly goes. I still have about 8 kilos to go to get back to my ideal weight and I feel like all that weight is hanging around my tummy. My pants fit me everywhere else apart from my waist and this has caused a huge problem when I have been trying to buy new trousers. My normal size fits me perfectly – apart from the fact that I can’t do the button up… yet the next size up fits the waist but is baggy and loose everywhere else.

In the weekend my mission was to find a couple of nice pair of pants for work. After trying on about 70 pairs I collapsed in a heap in the changing room and whined to my Mum “Why can’t I just live in my PJ’s for the rest of my life?”.

After a restorative frappe I was ready to restart the search… but alas my hope had faded so much that I no longer had the will or the strength to try on any more items of clothing – I knew it would just depress me even further. So I did what most women would do in this situation.

I went shoe shopping.

And I found the most amazing pair of boots I have ever seen in my life… I fell in love with them the instant I pulled up the zips. But alas bad news was to follow as they were priced at a out of my – not any earning money at the moment -budget.

Again I collapsed in a heap – why were the G*ods against me? There was no way I could afford to buy them and that meant that I would have to lust after them from afar.

When I returned from my extremely unsuccessful shopping trip I waxed lyrical to my husband about the dream boots. – And this is where it gets good. He told me that I must have those boots and that he would part with some of his ‘pocket’ money as a contribution to them… so the next day we went and put them on lay-buy and in four weeks time when I actually have them in my possession I will be the happiest girl in the world.

These boots are so good that I am sure that they will even glam up the sweat pants that I am going to have to wear to work!!

My first Mothers day.. May 14, 2007

My first mothers day was pretty fantastic – But that was probably because I hadn’t let myself set any expectations. In my head I thought I would have a house-load a smelly boys, a hung-over husband and a scratchy baby – but luckily it didn’t turn out that way.  On the Saturday night the Adman had five of his high-school friends over for a ‘few’ drinks. Three of these friends he hadn’t seen in over two years. Anyway I spent most of the night hiding out in the bedroom watching DVDs although I did have to laugh when I ventured into the lounge at one point -I walked in expecting to hear all the typical boy stuff – you know fast cars and tall stories about high school…but instead I walked into a conversation about coffee groups and how their partners were finding motherhood. I guess you can say the boys had grown up – into Fathers!

The next morning the Adman exceeded himself and had all the boys out of the house by 9am. Adman had been teasing me that the Young Man had told him that he wanted to buy me an onion for Mother’s day so I was stoked with my Dirty Dancing DVD. The Young Man and I enjoyed watching it later in the day – although I covered his eyes when there were the rudie scenes.

Up until now Mother’s day has never been something that I really celebrated.  Usually I would just ring up my Mum and tell her that I loved her .  But this year I’ve realised that Motherhood is something to celebrate and rejoice in.   When I think how I have found that last few months I have a new appreciation for my Mum – she’s coped with me for 27 years!

Motherhood really is the hardest job and I am pleased that I  the Young Man decided to ‘hire’ me to  be his Mum.

100 things May 10, 2007

1. I have been married to the Adman for 4 years and 2 months
2. Our wedding only cost $3,000 because I had just finished university so we had no money
3. We still had 125 guests at our wedding
4. My engagement ring was Adman’s great grandmothers
5. I have a Bachelor of Arts majoring in Psychology and Education and a post graduate diploma in primary education
6. I have enrolled to do my Masters twice but pulled out at the last minute – mainly because I am scared of the workload
7. I was a primary school teacher for total of 8 months before I changed my career
8. My husband is a Paramedic
9. We have 1 deaf dog ( Kaja – a German short-haired pointer) and 1 fluffy black cat called Jess
10. I have endometriosis and we thought that we might not be able to conceive very easily
11. It took five months for us to get pregnant and I know the exact day that the Young Man was conceived
12. My son was 7.4 pounds when he was born
13. Three months later he weighs 14.3 pounds
14. I had an epidural for my labour as the Young Man was posterior – Thank god for the epidural is all I can say
15. The Young Man ended up stuck so forceps were used to get him out.
16. He had a black eye for the first week of his life
17. I ended up with a 3rd degree tear
18. Luckily everything healed well and things are all back to normal if you know what I mean
19. I went into labour on my exact due date – but because the Young Man got stuck he was born at 1.40am the next day
20. When I was pregnant I was a bee-arch. I threw tantrums on a regular basis. My husband just laughed at me – which just made me madder
21. My mother was 26 when I was born and my Dad was 56
22. My father died of an aneurysm when I was 14
23. My older brother no longer has anything to do with our family – we don’t know why
24. I lived in the same house until I was 18 – it was the house that my Dad grew up in.
25. I have lived in both Wellington and Auckland – I prefer Wellington -although our life is better in Auckland
26. The worst thing about Auckland is the lack of good cafes
27. Wellington has the best cafes in the world
28. My husband and I brought our first home 1 1/2 years ago
29. I am looking forward to going back to work part time in 4 weeks
30. I work as a consultant for a government agency
31. I have never worked for a private firm – I have always worked for government departments – I like it that way
32. When I was four I had a pet calf called bumble bee and a pet goat called Amos ( yes we lived on a farm)
33. I crashed my Mum’s car when I was 16 and only had my learners license
34. My Mum was in hospital at the time and I didn’t want to stay at home by myself
35. My Grandmother is 83 and she is one of my best friends
36. My best friends when I was five were Naomi and Renee
37. My best friends when I was 16 were Jacqui and Natalie
38. When I was a kid I tried to convince my parents that I should receive presents on the 1st of May since my middle name was May – it didn’t work surprisingly
39. I like to read blogs as I am a generally nosy person and I like to know what’s happening in other people’s life.
40. The first boy I had a major crush on has turned out to be gay.
41. In hindsight its obvious that he was gay but when you are 14 its a little hard to work those things out.
42. I lost my virginity 3 days after my 16th birthday – I regret that
43. I only learnt to swim properly two years ago when I did a mini triathlon.
44. I hate exercising and will do anything to avoid it
45. I gained 27 kilos during my pregnancy – eleven of it in the last month
46. I had lost 13 kilos four days after the Young Man was born
47. I still have 8 kilos to go
48. I love drawing and painting and considered it for a career but I decided that I loved doing it too much to have to do it everyday
49. My favourite drink du jour is Kahlua and coke
50. I first got drunk when I was 14
51. I haven’t been drunk since May 2006
52. I have tried marijuana but don’t really see the point of it
53. When I was a child I was in a major earthquake and it scared me so much that each night for several years afterwards I would pray ” Dear G*d, please don’t let there be an earthquake tonight’
54. I love reading and when I can I will just sit and read all day ( haven’t had much time to do that lately!)
55. The last book I read was such a disappointment that I can’t even remember the title
56. I used enjoy reading Jodi Picoult books but they all seem a tad formulaic now
57. My husband and I nearly broke up 2 years ago because of some very stupid behaviour on his part
58. We went to counselling and it was the best thing we could have ever done.
59. We know how to communicate now
60. Why is it so hard to actually ‘talk’ to someone you love so much?
61. I sucked my thumb until I was 6. I kinda hope that the Young Man will suck his as well
62. I like *prah but can’t stand D* Phil
63. I love Debbie Harry/Blondie and have most of her albums
64. Her old stuff that is – I don’t her new stuff
65. I went to my first concert when I was 15 – it was Pearl Jam and I can still remember the play list
66. I use the – key far too much but I like to use it so will continue to do so
67. I find it hard to make friends because I am worried that people won’t like me
68. Most people think I am an extrovert but I think of myself as an introvert
69. I have a fear of birds – I am okay when they are still but as soon as they move I freak out
70. My friend in high school had a pet budgie and I wouldn’t go into her house when she had it loose
71. My favourite bands are “the Pixies” and a New Zealand band called “Trinity Roots”
72. When I was a teacher my biggest fear was that I wouldn’t be able to teach a child to read and it would be my fault if they failed in life
73. I love to cook – I prefer to cook than bake
74. I made by own muesli for the first time last week and it is super yummy
75. I might be a good cook but I make a big mess in the kitchen
76. Luckily the rule is that if you cook dinner the other person has to do the dishes
77. 75% of our arguments used to be about the dishes not being done
78. We have a dishwasher now so we hardly ever argue about the dishes
79. My favourite meal is Cajun Chicken Salad
80. My favourite desert is chocolate brownie – but it has to be crunchy on the outside and dense in the middle
81. I drink green tea in the mornings and if I go out for ‘coffee’ I will have a hot chocolate
82. I don’t drink normal tea or coffee – At Uni I used to drink 4-5 cups of coffee a day
83. I believe in G*d
84. I don’t go to church
85. My Mum would like it if I went to church
86. We used to have a cat called Moli – she got ran over when she was about 9 months old. I cried for a whole week- I was pregnant at the time
87. The hardest part about being a Mum is getting the Young Man to sleep during the day
88. I never get to watch my favourite programmes anymore as I go to bed so early
89. I like ER but find Greys Anatomy tiring – esp the whole Meridith / McDreamy thing
90. If I won $10 million I would pay off the mortgages of everyone I know
91. I am five foot six
92. I have blue eyes
93. Our Son doesn’t look like either of us – although he is a dead ringer for his Grandfather
94. I constantly have dreams that I accidentally leave the Young Man in places – last night it was in a motel
95. I wouldn’y survive without making ‘to do’ lists ( esp with baby brain)
96. My ‘to do’ list for this week includes making a new bean bag for the dog and buying new jeans
97. I constantly return books and DVDs late – even though I write it down on my ‘to do’ lists
98. I wear contact lenses although most days lately I wear my glasses as I can’t be bothered putting the lenses in
99. I want one more child – my husband wants another two – I will win
100. This was easy

First Things First May 9, 2007

So I guess I should write something meaningful for my first post but really all that’s on my mind is what am I doing wrong – why doesn’t the Young Man go to sleep easily during the day? Every time he is due for a sleep its a battle of wills and I end up either rocking him to sleep or giving him some boob. Yet at night time ( touch wood) he usually goes to sleep not a problem. Isn’t it funny how someone so small can rule your life and make you feel like an absolute failure. But of course the feeling of failure and angst disappears as soon as they give you a smile or giggle at you.

I knew being a mum would be hard work but I didn’t actually realise what kind of work it would be. I thought it would all be sleepless nights and crying babies – yet so far the hard work has been trying to remain positive and actually believe that I am doing a good job. The Young Man is now three months old and he has slept through the night once ( it was a fluke and no matter what I do I can’t replicate it). Its not too bad as at the moment he goes to sleep at about 7.30 and won’t wake for a feed until 3 – 4 am. But as much as I try i can’t seem to stretch that time out. the advice everyone gives me is to just ignore him when he wakes but after ten minutes of lying in bed with the aching boobs I usually give up and feed him.

I guess good things take time and when he does sleep through the night it will be a really good thing!

Hello world! May 9, 2007

Welcome to HerHangout.com. This is your first post. Edit or delete it, then start blogging!