Its a full time job…. November 27, 2007

The Young man is now  9 1/2 months old.  He is pulling himself up on furniture and cruising around.  He knows two words – Dada and ai-ya (which is his attempt at saying Kaja).  Of course no Mama – after-all I am only the one feeds hims, gets up to him in the nights, calms hims when he has fallen down for the 60th time that morning – I am not bitter though as I know he loves me ( but man I wish he would just say it ONCE!).

He has four teeth and is eating like a grown man.  He especially loves cucumber and strawberries and would happily  eat yoghurt’s until the cows came home to make some more.
We are still working hard on getting him to wear a hat when he is outside – I am not sure if making him wear an All Blacks cap is the best hat wearing incentive going by the look on his face.  Perhaps he still can’t believe they didn’t win the Rugby World cup?

Last week the Adman and I splurged  and brought the Young Man a little ‘dune buggy’.  Its something that most kiwi kids have when they are little.  Although he likes sitting on it he has yet to figure out that he needs to move his feet to get the bike to move.

 

And finally I guess his T-shirt tells it all.

Endo November 27, 2007

I was twelve when I got my period.  By the time I was fourteen I was suffering severe cramps, vomiting and heavy bleeding every month.  It wasn’t until I was 19 that I was diagnosed as having endomentriosis.    After my laprospic (sp?) surgery which diagnosed me I was given three options by the specialist 1.  Just put up with the pain, 2.   Take a higher dosed contraception  injection and 3.  Get pregnant.  Of course option 3 was out due to the fact that I was in my first year of university and I didn’t really see getting pregnant as an appropriate solution – silly specialist.  As for going on stronger hormone controlled drugs as I was really against that as I had a bad experience of changing from a 3rd generation contraceptive pill  a year earlier and I didn’t want to risk another emotional  break down.  So I just grinned and beared it for eight years.

Being on the pill helped heaps as it eliminated the vomiting and the inability to walk but each month I still had chronic cramps, heavy bleeding and an aching  and painful bowel.   It meant that for 8 years I basically I lived on pain relief. 

When we decided to get pregnant my biggest worry was what my periods would be like off the pill.  They SUCKED – but luckily I got pregnant after five months of trying, so I didn’t have to deal with them for too long.  For 15 joyous months I didn’t have a period.  In fact I managed to forget about the pain and the horribleness I had to face each month.    It of course all came flooding back (in more ways than one!).  After two months of ‘natural’ periods I decided to go back on the pill and it was a good decision.  I was lucky that it didn’t affect my milk supply – the Young Man was six months old by then and I was only breastfeeding him morning and night anyways.  Being on the pill means I can cope with my period and carry on living while I have it.  It means I only need to take  pain relief for the first two days rather than for about eight.

Last week when I had my period Adman asked me if being pregnant  had made a difference to my edomentriosis.  I had to think for a while but I was able to say yes it has.  Sure I still have pain and cramping but what I don’t have is the excruciating pain in my bowel that would cause me not to want to go to the bathroom.   I don’t have the heavy heavy bleeding and most of all I don’t have the constant feeling of wanting to be sick.

I know over time some of the symptoms will come back but at least for now I can enjoy the  little  enodo ‘bonus’  that being pregnant gave me.  When the specialist suggested all those years ago  that getting pregnant was a possible solution to dealing with endo I thought he was crazy but I know know that there was a method to his madness.

Set in Stone November 22, 2007

Before the Young Man was born  all my friends who already had children gave me one piece of advice- and that was to get a routine and stick to it.   I kind of understood what they meant but I still had visions of the Adman and myself going out at night time with the Young Man tucked into his buggy sleeping soundly.   I knew routine was important but I was adamant that we would still be able live our life.

And then the Young Man was born and it all changed.

From day dot the Young Man has always been VERY good at going to bed – we had some hard times with him staying asleep but generally he has been  a perfect boy when it comes to heading off to bed.  He has a bath, a couple of stories, gets in his go-go bag , has his final feed and then is snuggled up in bed for the night – fast asleep by 6.45 at the latest.

Because he has such a great night time routine I have been loathe to  mess with it.   I don’t mind if there are days where he has his morning sleep in the car while we are off somewhere or he has lunch half an hour later than usual. But when it comes to his  night time routine it is set in stone. 

This has caused a few issues with Adman as  there have been several times where we have been invited out to dinner with someone or a party somewhere and I have declined as it didn’t match up with the Young Man’s routine. This frustrates Adman as he thinks that we should have a social life and surely the Young Man is old enough to go out at night.  This is compounded by the fact that we don’t really have anyone nearby to babysit. So if we do get asked out the only choice is to take the Young Man with us.

The thing is that in theory it sounds all good – we can go out and the Young Man can just snooze in his buggy or in a port-a-cot.  In reality I know it won’t work  so I don’t bother trying it.

I am blessed that I have a baby who most nights sleeps for 12 hours and I do not want to mess with it – I have a fear that all it would take is  just one night of being out and about and the Young Man will decide  that he would much rather par-tay  than head of to the blanket show.

Tomorrow night we are going out to a BBQ and the Adman and I have splashed out and got a baby sitter – We were invited to bring the Young Man but I decided it was worth the few extra dollars to have him stay in his own bed and ensure that his night time routine remains – set in stone

No News November 21, 2007

As much as I like to believe the adage that ‘no news is good news’  we are yet to hear from the people who are interested in buying our house and I am now thinking that they must have changed their minds.     They had said that they would get back to us early in the week and it is now Wednesday morning which in my books is the very end of the  time period that you could call  ‘early in the week’.  I know that something may have come up or their broker might not have got back to them yet but of course I am thinking worse case scenario.

A very important lesson was learnt this morning – and that is not leave a bottle of moisturiser in the lounge with the lid off.  I left the Young Man in the lounge while I went to the bathroom and when I came back he was rolling around in a huge pool ofn moisturiser – all over the carpet.  Luckily I have managed to clean it up and I don’t think it will stain the carpet but man it was funny – the look on his face when he saw me – as though to say “look  how clever I am!!”

Six things November 19, 2007

1. We have somebody interested in buying our house.  My extremities are crossed in the hope that their finance etc works out and that we can reach an agreed figure.
2. The Young Man had his first ’swim’ in a paddling pool during the weekend – he love it.  So much so that as soon as he was dressed he was trying to climb back in!
3. Moving is actually beginning to seem real now and I am starting to plan and write lists – which is a classic sign  I am getting excited.
4. I realised during the weekend that I haven’t had a hangover in almost 20 months – and I like it that way – I couldn’t imagine being hungover and having to look after a baby
5. It looks like its going to be a good summer – at the moment most days reach 23 degrees and  its only going to get warmer
6. I ate a whole king size bar of cadbury’s fruit and nut on Friday night – it was delicious but on Saturday  I wished I still had some!

All by myself…. November 15, 2007

One of the things that hit home for me when I was reading one of the several thousand ‘baby’ books out there was something about co-sleeping.  Now I don’t really agree with the idea of co-sleeping – in theory its a great idea but I just don’t see how it can happen  and allow everyone to get enough sleep.  Anyway this book said that co-sleeping  allows babies to feel safe and not alone – after all as adults we share our bed and are not banished to separate rooms.

That one phrase relaly hit home to me as I love nothing more than sharing my bed with my husband. In fact I have never really liked sleeping alone and as a child would often sneak into my parents bed during the night.   Being able to snuggle up to someone who makes you feel safe is the best antidote to not being able to sleep.  Having someone to hold your hand when its stormy outside is so comforting. 

But as the wife of an Paramedic I am also used to sleeping by myself.  Adman’s shifts are two 12 hour day shifts and then two 12 hour night shifts so 2 days out of every eight  I have to sleep by myself.  Usually on the first night I think its great and I sleep like a star fish  or sleep sideways taking up the whole bed.  Its not until I wake up to pee that I realise I don’t like sleeping alone.  Instead of being able to come back to bed and snuggle up to Adman  the bed is empty and already the spot where I was sleeping is getting cold.

Usually when this happens I turn on the radio and listen to talkback radio until I fall back asleep.  I never sleep as well when I am by myself – I wake more often  and hear all the night noises more keenly.

Adman is away for the next 4 nights doing some training and up until now I was looking forward to having the bed to myself.  But now I am beginning to wish he was here.   I don’t like being alone and I don’t like not having him to snuggle up to. 

Its also made me realise how scary it must be for the Young Man  to be in his cot all by himself.  But I know that introducing co-sleeping would be a terrible mistake so as tempted as I am to bring him into my bed I will refrain and just be all by myself tonight.

Old November 14, 2007

 When the Adman and I met a little over ten years ago I was a 17 year old – I was a size 10 and had nice perky breasts.  Adman was 19 and was in pretty good nick as well.  Ten years later we only now seem to have made the realisation that we are getting old.  The other night Adman was on  the computer as I was making the bed (I am so lazy that I don’t make our bed when we get up - I make it just before we go to bed!).  I suddenly looked over at the Adman and realised that he was a 30 year old man with a bit of a belly - not the 19 year old boy who had great arm muscles from lifting car engine parts.  Adman saw me looking at him strangely and asked what was up. I stupidly didn’t think before I opened my gob and said ” I’ve just realised that you have got old”.  The look on his face was one of shock and horror – he was quiet for  half a minute or so until he said  “Yeah well you have crows feet”.

The thing is I had to agree with him.  I am getting old.  I haven’t been ID’d for alcohol for at least 2 years now and when I look in the mirror I don’t see a young face but a face that is tired and needs a bit of TLC.  Inside I still feel like the 17 year old I was when I met the Adman but on the outside I am practically unrecognisable from that person.   My boobs are bigger ( infact one is alot bigger than the other one but that’s a whole separate post), I have stretch marks all over my tummy,  I am getting flabby arms, I am at least 2 sizes bigger (on a good day) and my face has permanent wrinkles.  To make matters worse I found – what I consider the number sign of old age creeping in.

The other night while watching meaningless crap on TV and trying to avoid the fact that there was a kitchen full of dishes to do I was unconsciously rubbing my chin when I felt it.  I  couldn’t be sure it was what I thought it was so I rushed into the bathroom  and looked in the mirror.  Yup it was a hair – on- my – chin.  I was either turning into a witch or I was getting old.  Since I didn’t have any other signs and symptoms of witchiness (i.e.  wart on my nose)  I knew that I was getting old.  Old smelly ladies have hairs on their chins not young Mum’s like me.  Luckily I knew the remedy and quickly plucked it and flushed it down the drain in an action so swift that I was almost able to convince myself that I had imagined it.

But in the plain old light of day I know its true – I am getting old and and my body is no longer what it once was.  But the good thing is that the Adman is getting old as well and I know for a fact that he loves the current me far more than he loved the 17 year old version.  I guess as we get old our love gets older – and wiser too – thank goodness!

But What If… November 12, 2007

Our life at the moment is full of ‘what ifs’.   Although we know we are moving we don’t really have a firm date set (although I start my job on 7 Jan so I guess I need to be there before that) and the main reason why we haven’t made a firm decision is that it is dependant on so may things.   If our house sells…. what if it doesn’t….. what if we can’t rent it out…..if Adman  gets a job …… what if he doesn’t……. If he gets an education position and has to commute…….  if he doesn’t get a job should he move down with us…….  could we survive financially if he isn’t working….. yes – but only if we sell the house.

Its a never ending circle of ifs, and to tell you the truth we have been avoiding making any decision as we have no idea what decision to make.   I am hoping that the next week will bring the clarity needed to ensure our move is as smooth as possible.

We had our first open home yesterday and 4 groups came through – a couple showed interest so we will follow that up tonight and see if it eventuates to anything.  

On a brighter note the Young Man seems to have taken a respite from teething and is back to sleeping through the night – thank goodness !  He is a barrel of laughs at the moment and is getting a wicked sense of humour.  He thinks it is extremely funny to try and steal our cell phones and when he does get one he will sit there waving it at us laughing.  As it is nearing summer we have been trying to get him to wear a hat when he is outside.  So far we have lost 2 hats while out for a walk as he will fling them off when we aren’t paying attenion.  The sun in NZ is very harsh (due to a giant hole in the ozone layer) andyou cna get burnt in 10 minutes during the middle of the day so its really important that he learns to wear a hat but he seems to have other ideas.

 And now for your veiwing pleasure…. a couple of shots of the Young Man humouring me by wearing his hat. 

The Young Man is still in love with the cat and spends most of his days chasing her around the house trying to stuff its tail in his mouth.  So far she hasn’t swiped at him but its only a matter of time…..

 and  one of K-dog since she hasn’t made an appearance  for a while.

Bad Day November 9, 2007

You know its going to be a bad day when you finally get around to having the cup of tea you made at 6.30 and its 9am – its cold but you don’t care

You know its going to be a bad day when you decide to get McDees for lunch and they give you a f*llet o’fish with no fish in it.

You know its going to be a bad day when your son decides that morning naps are overrated and he would rather just sit in your lap crying very loudly in your ear.

I should have just skipped today – bring on Saturday and my once a week sleep in (A sleep-in if you don’t count getting up at 6am to feed the child)

365 days ago November 8, 2007

This time last year I was 7 months pregnant and all of a sudden I was beginning to get really big.  It was about November when I got my first  dreaded stretch mark.  It was tiny – only about 2 cms long  but it made me despair as I knew I was going to get a whole lot bigger before the Young Man was born which of course meant a whole lot more stretch marks.

This time last year we travelled to Wellington for Adman’s Aunty’s and Cousins birthdays.  It was a great time  and I loved seeing everyones shock when we told them we were going to name the baby Holden Commodore (Adman’s fave car) .  From day one we knew what we were going to name the Young Man (after both his grandfathers) but we didn’t want anyone to put their 10 cents worth in ( you know …”I went to school with someone named that – he smelt funny”…. ” oh no not X,  that’s a terrible name for a baby”).  So we told every one that his name was going to be Holden.  Most people tried to be polite but you could see they thought we were crazy.

This time last year I was eating salt and vinegar chips on a daily basis.  I blamed pregnancy cravings but really I just loved them so much it was nice to eat them with out feeling guilty. 

This time last year  I was beginning to look forward to summer - For some reason I always found it really hard to keep warm when I was pregnant -  little did I know that  I would come to hate -nay detest – the summer heat and  would beg for Adman to invent a bed that had air conditioning sheets.  One night just after Christmas it was so hot that I ended up sleeping starkers with no sheets on and woke the next morning  bitten from head to toe by mosquitoes -  it just gave me  something else to complain about.

This time last year  my husband decided that he was going  to finish of his degree -starting semester 1 2007  ( 5 days after the Young Man was born).  He ended up going to the first lecture and realised that there was no way he could  be a great Dad and  complete the uni papers without falling to pieces.  It was a wise decision to stop.

This time last year I couldn’t imagine myself with a baby – now I can’t imagine what life would be like without him.